Everything Under the Son
Because JESUS is my everything
How a Quote Spoke to My Heart
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
Everything and nothing. That's what we've been up to around here. We have been busy, but we've also been enjoying the lazy days of summer. Really, can it get any better than that?
We have been hanging out at home, and I have decided that the daily schedule I created is really a good thing. There is something good about having time set aside for some fun, even if it is only the fun of watercolor painting around the dining room table. My kids like the structure. It's so easy for the minutes and hours to get away from us if we don't take note of how we are spending them. I don't want to look back at our summer vacation and see nothing but time and brain cells wasted on too much TV/video games, and not enough reading and playing and laughter. Don't hear me say that we don't watch any TV or play any video games. Sure, we have time for those too, but I am really trying to limit it...for the kids AND ME!
I don't know about you, but the summer months can be hard for me as a mom. I look around and see so many people I know taking grand trips, and doing lots and lots of special things. It's easy to feel like I am somehow failing my children because we cannot spend a week at Di$ney, or tour the Smithsonian in Washington, or spend time at a lodge/resort. After all, isn't that what summer is for? Big family vacations, complete with lots of pictures and souvenirs? Or maybe summer is about pool memberships and seeing all the new movies in the theatre, complete with cokes and candy and popcorn.
I read a quote the other day that has been at the forefront of my mind...it continues to echo in my thoughts, and I am challenged to re-think things.
We have been hanging out at home, and I have decided that the daily schedule I created is really a good thing. There is something good about having time set aside for some fun, even if it is only the fun of watercolor painting around the dining room table. My kids like the structure. It's so easy for the minutes and hours to get away from us if we don't take note of how we are spending them. I don't want to look back at our summer vacation and see nothing but time and brain cells wasted on too much TV/video games, and not enough reading and playing and laughter. Don't hear me say that we don't watch any TV or play any video games. Sure, we have time for those too, but I am really trying to limit it...for the kids AND ME!
I don't know about you, but the summer months can be hard for me as a mom. I look around and see so many people I know taking grand trips, and doing lots and lots of special things. It's easy to feel like I am somehow failing my children because we cannot spend a week at Di$ney, or tour the Smithsonian in Washington, or spend time at a lodge/resort. After all, isn't that what summer is for? Big family vacations, complete with lots of pictures and souvenirs? Or maybe summer is about pool memberships and seeing all the new movies in the theatre, complete with cokes and candy and popcorn.
I read a quote the other day that has been at the forefront of my mind...it continues to echo in my thoughts, and I am challenged to re-think things.
"Comparison is the death of contentment."
--Original Author Unknown
Let it really sink in for a minute. Don't you love that? It hit me right between the eyes though, and I'll admit it was not pleasant! I hate it when that happens. You see, when I read it, I realized that I had become consumed with comparing myself to others...unfortunately, comparing myself in many areas of my life. My thoughts and comparisons looked something like this:
The material comparisons, like who has the biggest/nicest/newest car, house, computer, insert-material-possession-here, or who can take the biggest vacation. Those comparisons make me sad and frustrated, because to catch up with others in this area seems impossible for me. I compare myself physically to others, and once again feel like I'll never match up. I wonder if I will ever be thinner...tanner...beautiful. How is it that some people eat any and everything and maintain a healthy normal weight, and I can watch every bite, calorie, fat gram, and portion size, and work-out and still look....well, still look the way I do? If only the comparison stopped there. I look around at others and wonder how they can have perfectly well-behaved children while mine fuss and fight what feels like non-stop. How can they also keep perfectly clean houses, and always have well-balanced home-cooked meals on the table for their families? How can the house stay clean, and there be non-stop time for fun and crafts, trips to the pool and the movies and mini-golf? How is it that "they" can have it all together and be successfully parenting their children, while I am feeling like a failure? I mean, I can spend hours cleaning my house, and it will be time to start again in about 10 minutes. It is never clean! And how have I failed at parenting already...we've only just begun!
Let me be clear that when I was comparing, it wasn't that I didn't want others to have their blessings. I was happy for them to have the wonderful things. I was just jealous. I wanted them to have it...and me too! I wanted them to be happy and have their vacations/cars/thin bodies/perfectly clean homes/well-behaved kids, but I wanted it for me too!
Yikes! Can you imagine the frustration I had when this was the dialogue I had going in my head? To top it all off, I am a first-born, Type-A, right-brain person. Yes, I know it is an odd combination. A right-brained perfectionist...crazy! You should try living it sometime! But I digress :)
Enter the quote...my new favorite quote:
"Comparison is the death of contentment."
--Original Author Unknown
Ahhhh! If you really breathe it in, there is freedom in it. I long for contentment, and my constant comparing was robbing me of it! I'm not so naive as to think I have conquered my weakness of comparison, and I know it will be a matter of daily, and sometimes even minute by minute, laying those comparisons down at the foot of the cross, but I feel like I am in a good place. I am seeking to find contentment, and seeking the blessings and joys of what I do have, what I look like, and who I am.
I may not be able to buy the latest and greatest, or the biggest and best, but I can be thankful that I have a home for my family, and a car that runs well and gets us where we need to go. I am thankful that even though we cannot afford a big summer vacation, we can still spend time together, laughing and making memories. I am thankful for this body of mine. While it isn't without issue, it has served me well. This body may not LOOK perfect, but it has been 'home' to all four of my children for a time...I have stretch marks to prove it! I can run and jump and laugh and play with my kids, and I count it a blessing. I may not have the cleanest house or perfectly made beds, and my children may fuss and fight sometimes, but we are together and we are living life.
I think the other thing I am realizing is that what others appear to have is simply that...my perception. The reality may be completely different. They may feel overwhelmed and wish they looked different, or that they had a bigger, nicer house/car/boat/whatever. Or the truth may be that they are hocked up to their eyeballs in debt from trying to "keep up" and take big vacations and buy the biggest and best. They may be able to keep a spotless house, but can they call it a home?
Contentment...I'm seeking it daily. And the bottom line is, all the time I spent looking AROUND, comparing myself to others and honestly feeling kind of cruddy about all of the ways I couldn't/wouldn't/didn't measure up, I was not looking UP. I was missing so many of the blessings that God had for me, because I was stuck in a pity party. One of those blessings...contentment.
This has probably been more info than you wanted from me today...or maybe it hits close to home for you too. It's possible that I am not the only one who has been feeling this way. I just know that ever since I read the quote, I have seen things differently, and I wanted to share it here.
My challenge for myself, and for you, too: Stop looking around and comparing, look UP and find contentment!
posted by Anne, 1:57 PM
4 Comments:
I LOVE it! Thanks so much for sharing :)
Great article! You are so right on so many levels and each of us needs that reminder! Thanks for writing!
Right there with ya... Why Facebook can make us all so sucked in, then so depressed.
Yesterday I was getting my hair cut. The gal cutting my hair noticed a client coming in had a new Mercedes. Mentioned to her husband/ heavily tattooed co-haircutting dude that client's sister had also just bought 2 -- not one -- new BMW's. "Yeah... but wouldn't you rather be you?" replied heavily tattooed haircutting dude. "Yeah... I would rather be me." she replied. Some pretty good philosophy from a tattooed haircut dude. I've got a pretty good gig, and I have no idea what is going on with other people.
Yesterday I was getting my hair cut. The gal cutting my hair noticed a client coming in had a new Mercedes. Mentioned to her husband/ heavily tattooed co-haircutting dude that client's sister had also just bought 2 -- not one -- new BMW's. "Yeah... but wouldn't you rather be you?" replied heavily tattooed haircutting dude. "Yeah... I would rather be me." she replied. Some pretty good philosophy from a tattooed haircut dude. I've got a pretty good gig, and I have no idea what is going on with other people.
Amen!!! Great thoughts! We could all use a reality check and focus on being content. Thanks, Jacki
